Humor

On the lighter side…

Drinking and Driving…

 I would like to share an experience with you, it has to do with drinking and driving.  As you know some of us have had brushes with the authorities over the years.  The other night I was out for dinner with a few friends.  After consuming too much wine, and knowing full well that I was wasted, I did something I’ve never done before.  Believe it or not, I took a bus home.  Yes, a bus. I arrived home safely and without incident. This was really a surprise to me since I have never driven a bus before.

 

An Elderly Lady and Obama…

An elderly lady was walking on the golf course on the island of Martha ‘s Vineyard. She slipped and fell.  Obama who was behind her by chance, helped her to get up promptly. She thanked him and he answered: “It was a pleasure to help you. Don’t you recognize me? I am your president. Are you going to vote for me in the next election? ”  The elderly woman laughed and replied:  ”You know … I fell on my ass, not on my head!”

   

An Arab Muslim enters a taxi inNew York City…

 Once he is seated he asks the cab driver to turn off the radio because he must not hear music, as decreed by his religion.  He explains that in the time of the prophet there was no music, especially Western music (which is music of the infidels). And there certainly was no radio. The cab driver politely switches off the radio, stops the cab and opens the back door.  The Muslim asks him:  “What are you doing man?”  The cabby answers “In the time of the prophet there were no taxis. So get the hell out and wait for a camel.”

 

 

 

Friend:

 Every night in the White House, I see Barack up late poring over briefings, reading your letters, and writing notes to people he’s met.  He’s doing that for you — working hard every day to make sure we can finish what we all started together.  This week, I need you to have his back.  Will you donate $3 or more to support Barack before Saturday’s critical fundraising deadline?   https://donate.barackobama.com/Support-Barack.

 Thank you.

Michelle

_____ 

Dear Michelle,

 I don’t like what “we” started.  Please stop and give me my money back.

 Former Friend,

Joe American

 

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