Smile II

The Admiral & The Farmer


Air Traffic & the Admiral

Assuming the duty in the control tower at Naval Air Station Barbers Point, Hawaii, I noted an inbound flight with a VIP5 on board. This was probably a 3 star admiral. I alerted my crew to the fact that we had a dignitary inbound and we started our watch.

Honolulu Approach Control notified us of the inbound VIP flight approaching the outer marker of the instrument approach it was going to fly. About that time, a P3 sub chaser that had been doing touch and goes in the pattern alerted the tower of a possible emergency. About a minute later the P3 declared an emergency and notified tower that number 3 engine was shut down. No big deal with 3 fully operational engines left but standard procedure to declare an emergency.

The crash trucks rolled along the runway on which the P3 was assigned to land. Meanwhile, the VIP flight, having progressed to within a mile of landing threshold, was told to go around. After a brief silence the pilot of the VIP flight replied, “Understand go around. You do know we have the admiral on board.”

After another brief moment of silence the tower responded, “Yes sir. Take him with you.”


Skinny Dipping

An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some orange, and lime trees.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn’t been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.

As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, ‘we’re not coming out until you leave!’ The old man frowned, ‘I didn’t come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked.’

Holding the bucket up he said, ‘I’m here to feed the alligator.’

Some old senior men can still think fast.


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