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The Shrink versus The Bartender + Hillary Trust

The Shrink versus The Bartender

Ever since I was a child, I’ve always had a fear of someone under my bed at night, so I finally went to a shrink and told him: “I’ve got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there’s somebody under my bed!! I’m scared. I think I’m going crazy.” “Just put yourself in my hands for one year”, said the shrink. “Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears.” “How much do you charge, I asked?” “Eighty dollars per visit”, replied the doctor. “I’ll sleep on it”, I said.

Six months later the doctor met me on the street. “Why didn’t you come to see me about those fears you were having?” he asked. “Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is $12,480.00. A bartender cured me for $10.00. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup truck.”

“Is that so?” With a bit of an attitude he said, “And how, may I ask, did a Bartender cure you?” “He told me to cut the legs off the bed. Ain’t nobody under there now.”

FORGET THE SHRINKS. HAVE A DRINK & TALK TO A BARTENDER!

AND REMEMBER, IT”S ALWAYS BETTER TO GET A SECOND OPINION

 

 

Things I Trust More than Hillary Clinton

 

Mexican tap water

Rattlesnakes with “pet me” signs

OJ Simpson showing me his knife collection

An elevator ride with Ray Rice

Taking pills offered by Bill Cosby

Michael Jackson’s Doctor

Obama Nuclear deal with Iran

Gas station sushi

Brian Williams news reports

Loch Ness monster sightings

Prayers for peace from Al Sharpton

Playing Russian Roulette with a semi-auto pistol

Emails from Nigerian princes

Heimlich Maneuver from Barney Frank

Condoms made in China

Bill Clinton at a Girl Scout convention

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